I Remember Your Laugh

Originally published  June 7,  2019, but I lost it and re-posted.

Mi Mama was a blend of Lola Beltrán, Lucille Ball and Paquita La del Barrio. Mi mama was a blend of Lola Beltran, classy dignified and strong. And had the perfect timing, humor abilities of Lucille Ball humorous and hilarious and the hypnotic storytelling charm of Walt Disney. it was through her storytelling that she helped and kept her children spellbound and opened our minds to all of the possibilities that life had to offer. I know all of my siblings are very verbal because of Mi Mama’s modeling her creative verbal abilities. With the heart of mother Theresa, Mi Mamá would love on you and feed you to death. And finally, kin to Paquita La del Barrio, (feisty don’t take no BS) Paquita sings of the large-scale indignities of being a woman in a macho society. Quite the blend. No, she was not a singer (although she had a beautiful voice) and always sang to us. She was not an actress, a famous figure. But a woman way ahead of her time and who’s passion was her children and she was famous to me. She had to drop out of school, in order to help her family financially. Her highest level of schooling was seventh grade. But, Mi Mama had more common sense abilities in her pinky than five people than 10 people! Since common sense is derived from life experiences rather than study. Later on in life this common sense transformed into wisdom and she was sought after for conversation and advice. She had a kind face and heart and was very approachable especially to women who identified with her about their similar life experiences. Although, at times she may have projected a hard exterior we knew she wasn’t. How do you become a mom at 16 years old and be expected to know what the heck you are doing and to boot my father was no support whatsoever. In fact he was abusive, mentally and physically. She endured much pain with him and other relationships until she saw the light in spite of this ugliness in her life she was genuinely a happy woman. I later learned she suffered from depression, but I wish to remember the good times of her life and not dwell on her illness, the negative or her passing. She was very good at math also in memorizing numbers. I think she had every telephone number in Huron (population 1200) memorized pre iPhone days. Even though she lived in a culture that had very defined expectations and rules for her and all women she wanted her daughters to flourish and not live under those restrictions and limitations imposed by the Mexican culture she wanted us to break out! It was of utmost importance, that we not repeat her life! She wanted us to have a voice to be equals in a relationship, to receive an education, to make our own money and not be dependent on a man. Because of Mi Mama I know I can fly. She was the first person I went to cry on and the first person I shared my good news. All mother daughter relationships are strained at times and we had a few of those conflicts, but more often than not our alone times were very pleasurable and filled with laughter, besides our shopping trips I would take her for rides in the country and alleys and buy her a soft serve at Dairy Queen. It was the simplest of memorable times with Mi Mama and I. As her first born I always felt like we grew up together I could talk to Mi Mama as if she was a girlfriend, but I always viewed and respected her as my Mama. We had a special relationship, as her first born. Her love, encouragement and strength have carried me through so much since the day I entered this world. She taught us to respect people and about our Lord. Growing up in the San Joaquin Valley (the fruit and vegetable basket) of the country I also learned to respect the land and it will always provide for you. I would hear if it’s worth doing, do it right, she told us if you fall to shake it off and get up and carry on! In retrospect you could say Mama was judgmental, but not to justify her actions, but perhaps it’s an issue of semantics and we need more parental guidelines and parameters in our families. And, not call it being judgemental. Perhaps and just maybe our society wouldn’t be in such a mess and upside down. I recently saw a very young girl in my extended family with a very grown-up dress that did not seem appropriate to me, you may ask why wasn’t it appropriate? It was inappropriate because it did not fit the occasion she should of wore a cheerful spring dress, of course I would not say anything since she’s not my child, but I do wonder about why her own mother allowed her to pick such a sexy dress for her age that did not seem appropriate for the event, obviously they felt it was. My mama always spoke and directed us in not wanting us to grow up too fast, Mi Mama never held back. If she saw something that she felt was inappropriate she would call us on it. For example, she always wanted us to dress age-appropriate and classy. She would not pick my clothes, but instead guided me in picking a dress for a specific event. she was also strict with us about use of make up and dating. She wanted us to be respectful young ladies. We were her life and she took so much pride in us. She never ceased to amaze me and all her children. I recall much later in her life she took early education classes. She would forget the plot to certain nursery rhymes, so she would combine three or four and make her own. As the children chuckled and said , “that’s not the way it goes!” She got a kick out of it! She also took cake decorating classes she made homemade cakes for all her grandchildren and great grandchildren that were decorated beautifully. I feel blessed to have the Lord guide my pencil and for giving me a mama like Helen. Mi mama is my favorite writing material and I will never stop honoring her. I also know I have tons of writing material. Yes, she made mistakes, but she did so much right, as a single mama and raising us. My sisters and I recognize many children raised in two parent families, who did not come out as together and hard-working as we did, but of course this is unmeasurable. But, it’s an observation we feel and agree in our hearts. I know we were saved by Our Lord’s Grace. Abrazos y Besos

 

 

 

 

 

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abrazosybesosblog

I am perpetually creative, and my eyes “feel” art everywhere. Who am I, I am an open book. I believe that sharing “from the heart” with one another is what connects us, heals us, and inspires us! My love for my Lord, family, friends, cooking, crafting, gardening/nature, vintage, sewing and different cultures; these passions and too many more to list, have moved my hand to paper, thus, Abrazos y Besos. In addition to a nudge by my baby sister, Dudies. My last name is Hug which means Abrazo in Spanish, hence the name of my blog: “Abrazos y Besos” translating to “Hugs & Kisses.” I will focus on our personal life journey with Mi Corazon (Augie Hug) sprinkled with love, spice and fun. Please tune in. Philippians 4:13 New King James Version (NKJV) 13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

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